Water Ch. 173 - A Fresh Start?

"Texting right now, really?  It's that important that it can't wait?" he asks her, with a tone that shows her that he's pissed.  "Who are you texting?"

"Just a friend." and she drops the phone back into her purse. 

Jon isn't satisfied with her answer, so he asks her again, "Who to Beth?"  Getting up and taking the few steps to her purse.  Reaching in, he pulls out her phone and sees that it's Richie.  "Why in the hell are you texting Richie about me?"  He's pissed now, and he feels a little betrayed.  "Why?"

Beth sits up a little straighter, not sure how she wants this conversation to go.  "He's my friend too, Jon.  It was nice talking with him today."

"Explain to me that I never let anything go.  Why are you sending that to him?"  He drops her phone back into the purse that he took it out of, and with each second that passes he feels a little more betrayal.  "What did you tell Richie about us?"

"I didn't tell Richie anything about us."

"So, why the text then?"

"Jon, I can text who I want to text.  Richie is my friend too and he's concerned about the bullshit we have yet to face, because we have avoided the press about many things.  He's worried for us."

"Doesn't make sense.  What don't I ever let go?"

"ANYTHING, look at you now.  You obsess about the little things and can't focus on the big things Jon.  Jesus, it was great sitting there and talking to Richie.  Someone that hasn't seen the inside mess of our fucked up life." she admits to him that they talked and she can see that he isn't happy about it, but right now - she doesn't care. 

He's now up and pacing.  Running his fingers through his hair he looks at her and asks, "Please tell me what you talked about."

"Jon, we didn't talk about any one thing.  He's worried about us.  We just went through a nightmare no one should have to go through, he loves us and he's worried."

"Please, can we keep our problems to our self?"

"NO!  That's my problem.  I talk to no one but you, and you tell me what I want to hear or you really let me down.  I need a sounding board, ya know.  I don't have family like you do, and I'm most certainly not going to lay MY problems on your family.  I need an outlet to Jon." 

The look on his face tells her that she just put a dagger through his heart and she didn't like that, but it was the truth.  He was famous for telling her what he thought she wanted to hear or he let her down by letting it go in one ear and out the other. Or he has taken their problems and let others in, regardless if it was his mother or someone else, she didn't like that he could talk and she couldn't.  "I let you down?  When, goddammit!  When have I ever let you down?"

 

"Poor chose of words, I'm sorry.  There have been MANY times where I thought that I didn't rank even 5th on your chart of importance.  I have felt that you are with me, or you were with me because I was pregnant, and then when I flipped over the whole Dorothea thing, you know - her wanting me dead; you stayed in Jersey.  You never tried to contact me to work through it, not so much as a call."

 

"Well, you did leave quite abruptly and that told me that you didn't want to hear from me, much less see me.  But I want you to know this, I knew your every move.  I had a security detail on you the whole time.  The moving company you hired; I put that crew together.  The painters, same thing.  When I learned that you were moving and remodeling, there were not going to be strangers moving your stuff and painting.  I did that to protect you and our daughters."

 

"Sounds a little controlling.  Do you not trust my judgement?" she snaps back at him, a little ticked that he had a security detail on her and she had no idea.  "What gives you the idea that it's okay to do that to people, Jon?'

 

He was done, they needed to eat and he just wanted to relax with her.  "Okay, let's do this......we both have been a thorn in each others side and we are getting nowhere.  I love you and I love the fact that you are with me right now.  Can we try to put the past behind us and move forward from this point?  I will call Peter tomorrow and get the divorce rolling again - deal?"  He takes her hand, kisses it and continues with, "I don't want to be without you again.  No more running, no more private details and no more secrets - agreed?"  he kissed her hand several times and winked at her. 

 

She smiles at him and asks, "Where does your relationship stand with Dot?"

 

He answered it as fast as his mouth would move, "She is the mother to my children.  That's it.  No more, no less."

 

"Swear?'

 

"On everything that I hold dear to me,"

 

"So, there will be no more problems with her?" Beth knows the truth, but she takes Jon's answer at face value.

 

"She should be fine.  She's accepting that it's over, and that wasn't easy.  But I don't think that she will create any more problems for/to you."

 

She gets up and paces a minute, looking back to Jon, "Fresh start.  But if we have questions about the past, we talk about it.  No more hiring people to find out what I'm doing and at any point we decide that this is headed down the wrong path - we talk about it." with a breath she continues, "I love your children and I never meant to hurt them, or even you.  I got scared and went to where I was safe, I needed to."

 

"Ok, we're done talking about it.  So at this point, we have no secrets or nothing that you want to talk about?"

 

Her phone alerts her to a new text message. She grabs it out of her purse and reads it:  You should have stayed with me.  I'll treat you right. ~ RS

 

"What does it say?" her heart is in her throat and she feels like she might get sick.  She hands him the phone and he reads it.

 

"What the fuck does that mean?" he's a little loud at this point.

 

She sits down next to him and confesses, "When I was at Richie's, I cleaned up a bit.  I came across a notebook that had lyrics on it and asked him about them.  They are about me."  She waits.

 

"Okay, he's an amazing writer, is there more I need to know?  Were they good lyrics?"  Jon laughs a little bit.

 

"He kissed me, and I kissed him back.  It meant nothing, Jon.  We both were vulnerable and it just happened."  She looks at him, and the temple tension was getting worse, much worse.

 

Jon, animated again, throws his hands up in the air, "He fucking kissed you?  God damn him.  He's always trying to pull shit like that.  What did he say about it?"

 

Beth can see herself going defensive on this one, so she asks Jon, "What did you say to Richie during quick change the day you met me?"